Gaining confidence in crafting.
And learning to quiet the doubts.
Inside: unhelpful shoulds, fluffy yarn, a mystery, a happiness secret, striking flowers, fiber wisdom + the gift of pause.
I've been questioning myself as a knitter and the skill level I'm currently at.
There are many “shoulds” that come to mind: I should’ve tried Fair Isle by now, I should know more knitting techniques, I should be faster, I should knit more projects to gain more skill, and the list goes on!
I have doubts about my abilities too and I think “who’s interested in what I have to say about knitting or what I knit? There are many knitters more knowledgeable than me. I'm not good enough to be sharing my thoughts.”
A friend of mine studied neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) and we discussed my anxieties about where I'm at in my knitting. NLP is about changing someone's thoughts and behaviors to reduce anxiety and improve wellbeing.
She made me realize our thoughts lead us to the words we utter. Often I find I speak words without realizing they’re self-limiting. I often say: “it's not easy, but…” Saying this is self -defeating because I'm always thinking it's too hard!
My friend and I discussed how we have a little being sitting on our shoulder, talking into our ears. It's always saying the same unhelpful things!
I'm setting an intention to adjust my thoughts before I speak. So I can think, speak and act more confidently. This is my ongoing commitment to myself.
On a project note, look at the gorgeous lace yoke coming together on my true nature tee! I'm enough, and so is my knitting.
I'm an adept knitter who's still learning. And how cool is that?
I'd love you to share your thoughts in the poll.
And another question for you. Do you revel in your awesomeness, or do you have constant doubts too? I'd love to hear your story.
A trip down memory lane…
On my first visit to Madrid, Spain, back in 2018, I found the famous El Cato Negro, which means the black cat in Spanish. There were unbelievable amounts of yarn packed to the absolute max on the shelves!
Interestingly, there were signs that said “no tocar” (don't touch.) What that meant was you couldn't touch the yarns on the shelving.
You know how you get the colorway charts? They're a card with the strands of yarn. The store had a similar thing, but it was a wall display. So you could touch those strands. That was unique!
I found a beautiful turquoise Angora yarn, and through lots of hand gesticulation and basic Spanish, I bought enough yarn to make a design I'd seen, the Honey Cowl. It's a slip stitch pattern.
The Angora yarn was fluffy and I fell in love with the color! I also needed new needles for that yarn weight. The lady who looked after me suggested I try a set of aluminium circulars and they were the most brilliant neon yellow.
The combination of the turquoise and the neon yellow meant it would be a fun knit. The Angora yarn shed a lot! It was everywhere. Whatever I was wearing, it was all over me. Wherever I placed it, it left its turquoise hairs everywhere.
But the feel of it was extraordinary! Certainly, it's not for someone who doesn't like a super fluffy texture.
Anyway, the person I gifted it to loved it. I was really happy about that.
What I’ve loved this week: reads, listens, visuals and gratitudes…
I’ve been listening to the audiobook of “A Song of Comfortable Chairs,” from Alexander McCall Smith's No. 1 Lady Detective's Agency series. I’ve read several of these books before and loved them. This was no exception!
The main protagonist, Mma Precious Ramotswe, is such a formidable and lovable character. I found the descriptions of Gaborone, Botswana, fascinating. It gives me a perspective of someone who's been born and raised there.
You get a taste of the culture, the country's people and their values and beliefs. I've loved that throughout the series.
One thing that stood out to me was a conversation Mma Precious Ramotswe had with another woman who was distressed. She noticed this woman was crying, went up to her and said, "Mma, I see you."
The author explained this is one of the simplest and oldest African greetings. It implies so much more than it says.
It meant Mma Ramotswe saw not only the person in front of her, but all she was, all that was behind her, where she'd come from and what she felt.
Gee, that passage of text moved me! Being seen is such a gift of kindness. A dear friend of mine is someone who sees me and I am so grateful for that.
shared an excellent article about community this week.
To me, community is about being seen, being able to share with an open heart and mind without judgment. If you read through the comments of Louise's article, they're so uplifting! Head over and take a look.
I've been listening to the Imperfects podcast, run by three Australian blokes.
They interviewed a woman who’s regularly on the podcast. She's a psychologist and they call her Dr. Em (Emily.) She discussed the topic of “other people matter” and the fundamentals of positive psychology.
I've always had an interest in psychology. It's not something I wanted to do as a career because I think I’d be crying along with anyone I was trying to help! I know I have limitations. I’d be helpful but potentially not very professional.
She talked about the impact we have with each other when connections are made and how when we make someone else happy we become happier.
We're all on this elusive journey to be happier and we often think we've got to strive for it! But we can be more content if we help others to be contented.
This is often talked about in my guided meditations through Headspace.
When I take daily walks here in Chiang Mai, I do either the neighborhood route and enjoy the gardens in that area or another route which is towards a public park with exercise equipment and beautiful shady trees. When you live in a hot climate, any shade is absolutely welcome!
I took a photo of a painted mural. Can you see the dog on the wall and how it looks like it's hiding behind the bushes?
On another day, along the Ping River, I found a bank of planted flower beds. This is of a flower I don't recognize, but it’s extraordinary! The hot pink is amazing.
I'm so grateful for what I'm learning from others in Substack. I'm discovering all sorts of fiber-related information, and I was intrigued by a post by Kelsey on the embroidery of the Bayeux Tapestry. It's something I've never heard of.
I marveled at the fine embroidery thread she spun from Blueface Leicester and dyed with onion skins. It was the most intense gold, and so fine!
I had a lovely conversation with her about the process.
I'm learning so much about other fiber crafters and their processes, and that’s food for the soul.
A thought for you to ponder this coming week…
I talked about changing our thoughts so our words also change. I'm practicing thinking about what I say before I speak and using that wonderful action of pause. It's helpful to remember there’s choice between stimulus and response.
So, may you find pause when you need it most.
How’s your crafting going? Leave a comment or press reply!
(Disclosure: Any purchases made through links may earn me a commission.)
Before you go…
I've known how to knit since I was about 7 years old, but it's only in the last 15 years that I've started to learn more techniques. As a kid, it was something the lady at the historical museum taught me but then we moved so I only learned the basic stitch. Then knitting wasn't cool as a teenager. In my 20s I was too busy. It wasn't until my 30s that I picked it back up and realized how much I enjoyed it and benefited from it's stress relief and started to learn more. So, while I can do the basic stitch without having to look at my hands, there's still a lot of learning for me. That's exciting to think about.
“Do you revel in your awesomeness, or do you have constant doubts too?”
I’d say both. Generally I’ve been proud of how much I’ve learned in relation to my crafts, in such a short time, but then I get cold feet every time I start a new project. In some ways I feel “too new” to be hard on myself though at the same time I watch other knitters and think “why don’t you know how to do that yet?”
Yeah, my answer is firmly both.